On Getting Married...

The rest of the Thank You Speech

2011-10-22T11:48:00.005-06:00

Hello Friends & Family…it’s sure been a while since we posted on the blog and probably since we’ve seen you! So far this school year has been absolutely crazy! Craig is taking a full course load and has started working at Weber Motors Mercedes Benz dealership part time, though he is really enjoying his new job. I am working part time as well, as usual, and taking three classes, though one is advanced French, which feels like two classes instead of one, and I am working on my honours thesis proposal. In the next month, I will be sending out applications for English Master’s programs- can’t believe Craig and I are finally graduating this year! At any rate, as you can see things have been awfully busy for us, so we decided that instead of writing a complete and formal speech, we are going to finish the one we gave at the wedding. Meaning that we are going to thank, right now, everyone we forgot to thank at the reception. Time isn’t the only cause for this decision though, we also feel like much of what we want to say to express our gratitude is extremely personal, so we will save the extended, detailed and personal thank yous for the thank you cards. By now, most of you should have seen the preview of our wedding photos, if not, you can see them here. We expect to have them all by the end of the month, so thank you cards will be along in November.

On to the Thank Yous….

In our speech we, sadly and embarrassingly forgot to the thank the following people:

1) My Grandparents- Morris & Estelle Thompson and Molly & Jerry Scott: Thank you so much for attending our wedding, having you there with us was by far one of the best gifts we could have asked for. You are all an inspiration to us and we love you so much.

2) Tom Chrismas: I can’t believe we forgot to thank you in the speech!! Thank you so much for helping Mom host the rehearsal dinner, for driving everyone around and for being such a supportive force in our family. We love you.
3) Tracy Raypold: Tracy, thank you for the beautiful toast you gave at the wedding, your love and support mean so very much to us! xo

4) Haley & Shae and their parents, Tara & Bill: Our nieces, ringbearer and flower girl, you both did such a GREAT job at the wedding and looked so beautiful. Tara & Bill, having them in our wedding was such a joy and a delight- they were great, and so were you! Thank you. xo

5) Holly Thompson & her lovely friend Sarah Wylie: Holly, we did thank you for your terrific reading at the ceremony, but thank you also for recruiting Sarah to manage our music at the reception and for being such a great support to us. Sarah did a terrific job (thank you, Sarah) and we love you.

6) Bette: Thompson Thank you, Auntie Bette, so much for bringing the horseshoe for me to wear at the ceremony. Carrying on a tradition that you shared with Tara, too, is so meaningful to me, and I am so grateful to have shared it with the two of you. xo

7) Our photographer: Jessica Fern Facette. Dearest Jessica, I cannot believe we forgot to thank you after the wonderful job you did photography the heaps of people we organized together (family & friends) and even our dogs! Your generosity, professionalism and free spirit is loved and appreciated by all of us. Not only did you capture everyone beautifully, but already, in the preview, we can see that you captured moments very dear to us. You are a magical, mysterious and obscenely talented woman, and we are so grateful and so lucky to have had you for a photographer, and for our friend. xo

8) Rob Corno & Gordie Gerbrant: I think perhaps we did thank you in the speech, but I need to explicate a little on it. Thank you for stepping down from the wedding party with such grace and love, and for throwing me the best damn stag party with the guys that I could have asked for. The laser tag, the burger spread, the beers and poker, but most especially the thought and love that went into planning it- it was friggen awesome! Also, having you pick me up on the day of the wedding to take us there, was a memory I will forever cherish- not to mention a special thanks to Gordie for supplying the kick-ass Mercedes for that special trip! Thank you for being such an integral part of my life! Additionally, thank you for helping Craig with the music set up and equipment and for training Sarah on how to operate the slideshow and music, you were integral to the team and to getting an impossible job done. We love and appreciate you so much! xo

9) Caitlin Elm: My dear girl, you were remarkable! Thank you for the numerous make up trials and for coming to the hotel to do our makeup (me, Beav and Layne and the girls) the morning of the wedding. You did a beautiful job and having you with me before the ceremony was absolutely lovely. You have such a warm and beautiful spirit, I will always treasure the memory of you being with me and being so generous with your time and your talents. xo

10) Kelly Dean: Without your brilliance, creativity, and design expertise, we would not have had such subtly lovely décor for the ceremony. Thank you for coming with me to figure it out, for your awesome idea and for the endless assistance in implementing the design- we all know how infuriating it could be! I truly felt like you were part of the family at the rehearsal set up and love that such a significant part of the day (and the photos) existed because of you! Love you, girl! Thank you SO much! xo

11) Cookie Makers- Alysha Young, Danielle Newton, Beav, Tina Kenny and Marie McDermott: Making cookie dough, forming it and rolling it with Beav, Lala and Dano, is definitely a favourite memory from wedding preparation. Knowing that such friendship and heart went into the creation of our delicious party favours, made them that much more special. Thank you Dano, for finding the recipe and baking a sample for Craig and I to try, and thank you to Beav, Tina and her mom, Marie, for baking and bagging those treats two days before the wedding so they were as fresh as could be. We received SO many compliments on them, and even heard that the Graffs were hoarding them at the end of the night! Haha

12) Dariel Lamb & Sarah Danielsen: Thank you so much for taking the time to clean up the ceremony décor for us so that we didn’t have to worry about it. Knowing that two lovely and competent women took care of that for us eliminated some of the day’s stress. Thank you so much!

13) Gwen Corno: Thank you so much for taking the time to help me with the printing of all the wedding invitations and paper goods, the effort you extended for us is greatly appreciated! We love you! xo

14) Arnaud Baty & Gosia Krol-Baty: Thank you both so much for your hard work and tolerance through the design process for our wedding invitation. We LOVE the invitation so much and it’s even more special to us for having your heart and soul and energy create it. We love you both immensely.

Now, I imagine, everyone understands why we were so adamant in thanking all of our guests and stressing the importance of the community that made it happen. We thank all of you, those who attended and those who wish they could have, for sharing your lives, your time and your love with us.

Next post: HONEYMOON!

We're Back from the Honeymoon!

2011-09-09T00:16:00.000-06:00

Hi friends & family!

Did you miss me? Hahaha

First, I would like to thank you all again for coming to the wedding and sharing in what was an absolutely amazing day for both of us. We sincerely hope you all had as good of a time as we did (though I hear some had an even BETTER time! Haha).

Second, Craig and I are working on writing our formal "Thank You" speech (since we forgot) which we will be posting here on the blog because it really is VERY important to both of us that we thoroughly thank everyone!

Third, everyone is asking about wedding photos! We are patiently awaiting the professional photos from our dear friend, Jessica Fern Facette, as she puts in a TON of effort with post-production work and has been a very busy lady this summer- so please be patient too. As soon as we have them, we will post some on the blog, print out our Thank You cards (so you each get a pro photo), write our thank you cards and send them out to you!

In the meantime, I am working on the Honeymoon blog post and loading up pictures onto Facebook. I will post a few here as well, for those that do not have Facebook accounts. Our wedding video will be posted here eventually as well. So, that said, you aren't finished with this blog yet! Haha

But today, after heaps of requests, we give you the long-awaited wedding playlist, including the song selections from the ceremony, slideshow, bouquet and garter toss, as well as the dance in its entirety. Lastly, we included the short list of songs I had to cut during the actual dance because we had more songs than time. I hope this helps others with planning weddings and other dance events!

First Dance- taken by close friend Kelly Dean

Ceremony Music Performed by Sean Armitage and Aaron Mohr

Groom’s Processional: Hard Sun- Eddie Vedder

Bridesmaid’s Processional: Blackbird- The Beatles

Bride’s Processional: Wild Horses- The Rolling Stones

Reception:

Entrance Song: Young Blood- The Naked and Famous

Slideshow:

Bride’s Portion: The Suburbs- Arcade Fire

Groom’s Portion: Make Believe (West Coast Version)- Thornley

Bride & Groom: Home- Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeroes

Dance:

Sea of Love- Cat Power

Wild Horses- The Rolling Stones

The Way You Look Tonight- Frank Sinatra

Footloose- Kenny Loggins

Sweet Caroline- Neil Diamond

My Girl- The Temptations

Fishin’ in the Dark- Nitty Gritty Dirt Band

Do Ya Think I’m Sexy- Rod Stewart

Hung Up- Madonna

Just Dance- Lady Gaga (featuring Colby O’Donis)

Hey Ya- Outkast

My Maria- Brooks & Dunn

Fat Bottomed Girls- Queen

The Seed- The Roots

New Orleans is Sinking- The Tragically Hip

Stand By Me- Ben E. King

Chattahoochie- Alan Jackson

I Need You Tonight- INXS

Rock Your Body- Justine Timberlake

Shoop- Salt N’ Peppa

I Gotta Feeling- The Black Eyed Peas

Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy- Big & Rich

Fences- Phoenix

Bust a Move- Young MC

Could You Be Loved- Damian & Stephen Marley

Billie Jean- Michael Jackson

Roses- Outkast

Somebody Like You- Keith Urban

Mr. Jones- Counting Crows

Thunderstruck- AC/DC

Pour Some Sugar on Me- Def Leppard

Stuck in the Middle- Stealers Wheel

Groove is in the Heart- Dee Lite

Paper Planes- M.I.A

American Boy- Estelle (featuring Kanye West)

Miss You- The Rolling Stones (Dr. Dre Remix)

Body of Years- Mother Mother

Float On- Modest Mouse

In Da Club- 50 Cent

Sexy Back- Justin Timberlake

Dog Days are Over- Florence + The Machine

Bouquet Toss: Single Ladies- Beyonce

Garter Toss: Immigrant Song- Led Zeppelin

SADLY, songs that had to get cut due to time restraints:

No Diggity- Black Street

Something is Not Right with Me- Cold War Kids

Pumped Up Kicks- Foster the People

The Sweet Escape- Gwen Stefani (featuring Akon)

Empire State of Mind- Alicia Keys & Jay-Z

Fire- Joe Budden (featuring Busta Rhymes)

Gold Digger- Kanye West

E.T- Katy Perry (featuring Kanye West)

Kids- MGMT

Dashboard- Modest Mouse

Ms. Jackson- Outkast

Last Night- The Strokes

Blister in the Sun- Violent Femmes

Say it Ain’t So- Weezer

My Body- Young the Giant

Out of Town Guests: Things to Do in Edmonton

2011-08-09T09:50:00.003-06:00

Hello Dear Guests,

Just in case you aren't familiar with Edmonton, or have long since forgotten its little gems, here are some things to do or check out while your in town for our wedding:

All of our wedding festivities are taking place within 5 blocks of each other in Edmonton's downtown core. If you are spending the weekend, I highly recommend taking the time to check out the City Market farmer's market just north of Jasper Avenue on 104 Street in Edmonton's Warehouse District (only 2 blocks from the McKay). The market runs every Saturday from 7:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. and you can find out more about it here.

Edmonton's Warehouse District also boasts some great little shops including Sobey's Urban Fresh, C'est Sera clothing, Chemistry Clothing, 29 Armstrong, the Queen of Tarts bake shop & bistro, Tzin wine bar, Ric's Grill and the Blue Plate Diner (a personal favourite that serves amazing brunch on Saturdays and Sundays). Also, I have been hearing rave reviews for a new restaurant on Jasper and 104th called Corso 32.

Not far from there, on 103 Street, you'll find great restaurants like Haweli (East Indian cuisine), Sabor Divino (European cuisine) and The Creperie (French Cuisine). And right across the street is Edmonton's City Centre Mall which has a ton of shops (check out The Artworks) and a movie theatre. Nearby at Churchill Square, you'll find the Art Gallery of Alberta, the Winspear Centre, the Citadel Theatre, and the Stanley A. Milner Public Library and City Hall. The Art Gallery of Alberta also has a little restaurant called Zinc that I hear is amazing.
Closer to The Matrix, you'll find the Wildflower Grill, Audrey's Books, and a multitude of shops, bars and clubs down Jasper Avenue.

If you want to venture over to Whyte Avenue, just south of the river, you may like to wander over to Edmonton's Internation Fringe Theatre Festival where you can check out tons of shows and cool vendors like my friend Jonathan Luckhurst. Whyte Ave is also home to cool restaurants like Accent, Dadeo, Tasty Tom's, Julio's Barrio, Artisan Resto Cafe, Cafe Mosaic, Continental Treat, Chianti's, and our personal favourite, The Next Act Pub. If you like a great atmosphere, original artwork, and kick-ass burgers and beer, check it out! Last but not least, if you are on Whyte Avenue you MUST stop by Block 1912, a European Cafe famous for its drool worthy gelato!

As for shopping on Whyte, my favourite shop right now is Kika, a little dress shop on 105 St and Whyte, but you'll also want to browse The Plaid Giraffe, Chicken Scratch, The Tin Box, Gravity Pope, the Junque Cellar, Blackbyrd Myoozik, lululemon, Colourblind, Foosh, Plush, American Apparel, Bamboo Ballroom, Que, Sophia's, Bang On, Beadworks, Bizou Lash Studio, another C'est Sera, Crankpots, Coney Island Candy, Crave Cupcakes, Devine and Decadence vintage clothing, Lush handmade cosmetics, and too many more for me to remember!

For a map of the McKay Avenue School click here.

For a map of The Matrix Hotel click here.

Hopefully this helps you to plan your trip to Edmonton and your time between our ceremony and cocktail reception. And as always, please feel free to email us with any questions!

Love,
Athena & Craig

Update to Important Guest Information!

2011-07-28T10:49:00.001-06:00

Dear Guests,

The wedding is rapidly approaching at 23 days away! This coming weekend Craig will celebrate his stag party with his friends and family and the next weekend Athena will celebrate hers. There are still lots of little things to plan and take care of, but things are moving along rather smoothly, and we are getting VERY excited to celebrate our love and relationship with all of you!

That said, there are a couple of things we would like to share with you to enable you to best prepare for your participation in our big day.

1) We would like you to know that there are two Disabled Parking Stalls behind the school for those with Provincial Placards for Persons with Disablities as well as access through the door closest to those stalls for people unable to manage the front steps. Please ring the doorbell at the "Theatre" door and wait for an escort to let you in and lead you to the elevator.

2) In addition to the two free alcoholic beverages, the house selections of red and white wine will also be provided at no cost to you throughout the night. A big thank you to Craig's parents, Ron & Norine Raypold, for their generosity and hospitality to our guests!

Again, please let us know if you have any questions or concerns and we look forward to seeing you on August 20th!

Lots of Love,
Athena & Craig

Next Post: Information for Out of Town Guests

ATTN: GUESTS! Things You Will Want to Know About Our Wedding

2011-07-15T17:19:00.002-06:00

Dear Guests,

Just yesterday, as Craig and I discussed weddings with our best man, Ted, and his beautiful fiancé , Dariel, we realized that there are some things we should let our guests know to prepare for our upcoming nuptials (36 DAYS AWAY!).

1) I have said this before, but here is a reminder anyway: Our ceremony is taking place in a museum, the McKay Avenue School, which is also the Edmonton Public School Archives. There are lots of different pay parking lots in the area as well as metered parking. There is also some free parking in behind the building, though several stalls will be reserved for the bridal party and immediate families.

2) There is about a 5 to 5.5 hour break in between the ceremony and the reception. This is so that we can go for our pictures and an intimate family dinner prior to our cocktail reception. You may like to wear a more casual "daytime outfit" for the ceremony and then go home, run some errands, have a nap maybe, and then get all dressed to the nines for the cocktail reception. We thought our guests would prefer a larger chunk of time in between the events so that they could actually DO something during that time. I know that in between ceremonies and receptions there are usually 3 hours or so and most guests go out for a drink and a bite and then they are tired and full for the wedding. (It's happened to me A LOT!)

3) We are providing all of our adult guests with 2 free drinks per person (tickets will be handed out at the ballroom entrance) and free non-alcoholic beverages for the evening. If you plan to drink beyond those two free ones, you may want to bring some cash for the bar. PLEASE DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE!

4) Cocktails run from 7pm to 8pm and the wedding party will arrive (and be announced) at 8pm sharp. We will then launch into speeches, the slideshow and cake cutting. We'll be doing an impromptu receiving line as people come up for cake, so that will be your chance to greet the bride & groom. We're aiming to begin the dance at 10pm and a late lunch will be served, buffet style, around 11pm.

Please feel free to email us with any questions or concerns.

Lots of Love,
Craig & Athena

The Proposal Story

2011-07-11T11:31:00.003-06:00

And now… the long awaited proposal story.

When Craig and I first started dating, one of his best friends got married (our groomsman, Paul). Because of that, we pretty much began discussing our hypothetical future wedding from the very start of our relationship. Who would stand up with us? Would we have a big wedding or a small wedding? Would it be indoor or outdoor? What kind of rings would we get? What would be the most important parts? Etc., etc. Oddly enough, most of what we discussed in the summer of 2007 is exactly what we have planned for our wedding this summer!

In February of 2010 Craig spontaneously pulled me into Michael Hill Jewellers to look at engagement rings. We’d been occasionally looking at rings so that Craig could get the right idea of what I wanted (lots of little diamonds, antique-vintage looking, no solitaire), but this time we walked in and the second ring I tried on was THE ring. The one I had in my mind but couldn’t find for so long. We were both elated because we’d found it and because it was an affordable set: engagement ring, wedding band, and anniversary band for $1200. I was (and still am) a firm believer in not spending more than $1500 on a ring. That night we went out for Sarah’s birthday and told everyone we knew that we’d found the ring. I even sent my mom a text message (she was in Mexico) and the silly lady thought that finding a ring meant we were engaged.

Having found the ring, however, didn’t mean that a proposal would be immediately forthcoming; Craig wanted to pay cash for the ring instead of purchasing it with credit. But a couple of months later my friend Jeff was showing me a picture online of the ring he’d bought for Heather (they’re married now), so I looked up our ring online and it was on sale for $800! I immediately messaged Craig and he asked my ring size. I was pretty sure he’d buy it soon, but knowing Craig he would delay the proposal for the right moment.

Sometime in early May, I received a call on my cell with an unknown name. When I answered, the caller asked for Craig, to which I replied, “I’m sorry, this is his girlfriend’s phone you’ve called, can I help you with something?”

In a frustrated tone, without even introducing herself, the caller blurted, “I have this ring sizing here and I am not sure what to do with it!”

Taken aback, I said, “I don’t think that I am supposed to know about this.”

“It’s not a diamond or anything,” she retorted.

Annoyed by her attitude and unprofessionalism, I asked, “Is this Michael Hill Jewellers?”

“Uh, yeah…”

“Well then it better be a goddamned diamond because that’s what we picked out there. Tell me what the problem is and we can fix it and Craig will never need to know about this conversation,” I said.

“I can only speak to Craig since it’s his name on the order,” she said. Exasperated, I gave her Craig’s number and she had the audacity to ask me not to tell him about the erroneous phone call. At that point, I called a friend. She told me to “take it to the grave” and not tell him, but my friend Corey (Dano’s fiancé) insisted that Craig should know that the jewellers ruined his proposal. I didn’t know what to do, but ended up telling Craig two days later when Corey called and asked me if I had told Craig yet. When Craig asked me what I was talking to Corey about, I couldn’t lie and told him what happened. He was pretty upset, especially when he told me the problem was that they couldn’t size my ring small enough, they said they couldn’t size it smaller than a 5, and I am a size 4. Consequently, he went into Michael Hill’s the next day to sort it out and called me afterwards. Apparently, not only did they ruin the proposal, but they also charged him to size all 3 rings, when they shouldn’t have, and he was fed up, so he got a full refund and told me we’d find another ring somewhere else. As expected, I was devastated. Not only was I not getting the perfect ring, but the proposal would obviously be delayed.

Now, being the end of May, my 29th birthday was fast approaching (June 12) and I was trying to figure out what to do that year. To me, birthdays have always been a big deal, the one day of every year that all of my friends and family will get together just for me (added bonus: I get to be the centre of attention!). My mom attributes this, of course, to Middle Child Syndrome. Either way, it’s always a special time and I usually pack an entire weekend with birthday festivities. Yet Craig had never understood all the birthday planning and commotion and had “screwed up” so-to-speak on my previous birthdays. So, interestingly, he was making a big deal about my 29th birthday: he wanted to plan something for the Saturday nigh0t. His sudden enthusiasm for my birthday was a bit suspect and gave me cause to ponder. In combination with the ring episode, my mind kept wandering back two years to when Craig first moved in with me.

We’d been together for about 8 months when Craig moved into my tiny downtown apartment. Oh how I loved that little place, a big four plex circa 1932 with original floors and fixtures. It was tiny but it had so much personality and I had given it a kitschy vintage diner décor. Needless to say, my kitchen table was a little square diner table that barely accommodated two people and Craig wanted us to get something bigger. So off we went to the antique malls in search of a larger diner table. At the Rocky Mountain Antique Mall we found a mid-size red Formica top table with chrome trim and a leaf- EXACTLY what I’d wanted and for only $160. I wanted to buy it on sight but Craig wanted to wait a couple of days to see what else was out there. “Craig, this isn’t Ikea,” I explained, “they have ONE table not thousands!” I was adamant, but Craig was stubborn, so two days later we went back and the table, of course, was gone. I was really mad, but trying not to be mean about it as we hopelessly looked for something on par with that table. I gave up the search, to my dismay, but two months later Craig gave me that table for our one-year anniversary. It was gone because he’d bought it for me and hid it at his parents house! This was probably the only time in my life that I was happy to receive a practical gift- I’d made it very clear to everyone that I never wanted a practical gift (i.e. house wares, bedding, appliances, car stuff). I much prefer to receive gifts that I would love to buy for myself: books, clothes, jewellery.

Clearly, if the table secret was on my mind, and Craig was making a big deal out of my birthday, I was putting two and two together and coming to the awfully hopeful conclusion that Craig had lied about the ring and was planning to propose for my birthday. Why else would he make a big deal out of my birthday for the first time in three years? When I told Beav my suspicions she disagreed saying that Craig wouldn’t propose on my birthday and I ought not to get my hopes up. Those hopes were really shattered the day before my birthday when he sent me a text message asking where the wrapping paper was. I burst into tears at work and had to talk myself out of being upset and remind myself that I should be happy that he wants to make my birthday special and that a proposal would come eventually.

The next day, I went for brunch with my friend Jordan and came home to a beautiful bouquet of flowers and the first card Craig ever bought for me (a good and sappy one too- I cried). He told me I could have the rest of my birthday present once I was ready to go for dinner, so I showered and got ready and put on a cute outfit. When I told him I was ready to go he went downstairs and came back up with a huge box. As I followed him into the living room, I asked, “What is that? An appliance?!” He set it down on the coffee table and told me to open it. As I took off the wrapping paper, it became clear that it was, in fact, an appliance. “A toaster oven?” I asked, incredulous, “Is this really a toaster oven?” Craig was all encouraging smiles as I struggled to maintain my composure. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a knife to open the box, convinced that the box was merely a joke, only to discover that the gift inside really was a toaster oven. I looked up at Craig as I tapped the top of the oven with my finger, completely confused, and said, “Seriously? This is really a toaster oven…”

Craig nodded emphatically, “Yeah, babe, you can make pita pizzas in it!”

“You want a toaster oven,” I exclaimed, “I have never said I want a toaster oven.” At this point, I was trying not to get upset with him while also trying to figure out if he was totally screwing with me. Still smiling, he reached into his pocket and said, “Well…if you don’t want that you can have this instead.” And in his hand was the ring, the one we’d chosen. Before I even knew what I was saying or thinking, I asked him if he was going to get down on one knee, so he did, still holding the ring out to me. I took it and asked him if he was actually going to ask me, and he said, “Will you marry me?” Crying, I put the ring on, said “yes,” hugged him and laughed. Best birthday EVER.

Engaged June 12, 2010

McKay Avenue School

2011-05-27T16:44:00.001-06:00

So, my good friend Kelly, along with Danielle, Corey and I went to the McKay on Wednesday night to try to figure out our ceremony décor and Kel couldn't find it. Turns out the McKay Avenue School lettering is hidden by trees, AND it's a museum, which you should know. So, when you pull up on 99 Avenue and 104 Street you'll see a large red brick building, and a sign near it that says: Archives and Museum. Hopefully that clears things up in advance.

As far as parking goes, there are meters in front, and Impark lots nearby- you may need to walk a little ways, as well as stalls in behind the school. However, we will be reserving those stalls for the wedding party and immediate family.

Please let us know if you have any questions or concerns!
Athena & Craig

The Wedding Party Switch

2011-05-27T16:20:00.003-06:00

The last month or so since classes have ended has been a pretty emotional and stressful time for us. We are worried about money, jobs, school, relationships and, of course, wedding details and planning. Even after nearly a year of reading about weddings and the inevitable stress that comes with them, I have still been taken aback by it.

Weddings are wonderful and beautiful and fun, but they are also hard. Not only are two people committing to spending their lives together, but they are joining two communities of families and friends, and that inevitably, albeit inadvertently, creates conflict. But learning to cope with the emotional ups and downs that this transition brings, is a part of the process, and will cultivate stronger relationships- especially with our new family and friends.

Which leads me to the topic of this post: a switch in the wedding party.

A little history is in order here, so I will start with early 2002 when I was working as a manager at Metalsmiths in Londonderry Mall. I interviewed a very pretty and friendly little blonde called Layne. Unlike any other interview I’ve done, she and I instantly clicked, making our interview well over an hour. We spent the entire time talking, only to discover that we shared the same values and ideas about life, friendship, and family. Within a month we were best friends, going out to the bar, hanging out, and traveling to Banff to party and see friends. We became pretty much inseparable. Never had I had a friend quite like her. She was a lot of fun to be around: dorky and funny, warm and generous, clever and compassionate. (Side note: One of my favourite things about our friendship is that we always tell each other everything we’ve eaten in a day. So lame, but I love it).

Two years into our friendship we both dealt with hard hits: her boyfriend of four years broke up with her and I broke my neck, but we got through it together and not long after that we met her husband and my fiancé. Unlike Corey and Layne who hooked up immediately, Craig and I took a lot longer to get together; we’d known each other for two years before our first date. But just like us, they went through a lot on their path to marriage, lots of struggle and even more growth. Their biggest bump was in 2008, and in Layne’s heartache, she was a mess. One of my biggest regrets is that I wasn’t an honest, forthcoming or supportive friend to her at that time. When things got really rough between us, I pulled the chute and severed ties. We were both stubborn (incredibly stubborn), we were both hurt, and we were both waiting for the other to reach out. Nearly two years later, after a difficult and painful absence from each other’s lives, Layne reached out to me, congratulating me on my engagement. I responded in kind and we met for dinner and spoke very honestly about what happened between us, where we each went wrong, and about how we felt. Both of us took responsibility for our roles in the “break up” and both of us apologized. Turns out, we missed each other immensely… immeasurably.

Layne and me, circa 2006

Layne

Looking back, it’s both remarkable and predictable that we made amends so quickly and easily, but I think we were just ready to be in each other’s lives again, and to rebuild our friendship as adults. The time off allowed us to grow and mature, setting us back on the same path together, which I am unbelievably thankful for.

Over this last year, we have grown closer and closer and are more honest and vulnerable with each other than we ever were before. We reciprocate each other’s efforts, we understand and respect that we each have busy lives (me being a student and her being a new mom), we offer comfort and support and advice, and we now share all of our positive feelings about each other freely (not to mention is often my sounding board about wedding stuff and shows a genuine interest in everything I am planning for it). Just writing this makes me crazy emotional, I am tearing up now thinking of how far we have come as women and as friends.

So, all that said, Layne has once again (in addition to Beav of course) become my constant confidante. We talk or message every single day. We tell each other everything (nothing is taboo) and I just love her to pieces. Prior to our “break up” I always knew she would be my bridesmaid- just me, her and Beav- but all that had changed and asking her to be my bridesmaid did not make sense when our reunion was so new. But now, my heart wants so badly for her to be in my wedding party. It’s a raw, emotional need that has been growing in me for the last few months and one that has been difficult to let go of. Consequently, Craig and I spoke about it and we thought of adding a third member to the wedding party, but that was quite complicated…so I had a long heart to heart with Rob yesterday about giving his role as bridesman to Layne.

Oh Rob, ever the gracious gentleman, the considerate and thoughtful friend. I was so afraid to have the conversation with him, terrified I would offend him or hurt his feelings, but all that mattered to him was my happiness. Asking him to opt out so that Layne could jump in did not, thank goodness, offend him or make him question his importance to me. Rather, he assured me that he understands my desire to have another woman in the wedding party, someone who is interested in all the details, who will be excited about hair and makeup, and he also knows what Layne and I have been through, so he is wholly supportive of the switch. Also, it’s more a formality than anything since Rob will still pick me up for the wedding, he’ll still plan my stag (a party for me and my best guys), and he is still one of the absolute BEST people in my life (here I am getting weepy again). Rob also mentioned a desire to help out with more behind the scenes stuff, so he’ll be organizing and setting up the dance equipment and slideshow for us. As cliché as it sounds, words just cannot express how appreciative I am, and how lucky I feel, to have such an amazing and selfless friend who loves me and understands me. I love you, Rob- HEAPS.

Rob & Me circa 2004

And so, with utter joy, I happily announce that Layne will be by Beav’s side, standing up with me on my wedding day. Hooray! I love you, Layne!

PS An extra special thank you to Beav for her endless support and to Dano for asking me this week (in the sweetest most creative way) to be her Matron of Honour for her wedding next year. Love you both!

xoxox

Guest List, Attire and Registry

2011-04-27T13:35:00.002-06:00

Hello friends and family! School is finally finished for the year so now our energies will be poured into the wedding and working! By this time, all of our guests should have received their invitations to the wedding, so we’d just like to address a couple of things that have been noted as areas of contention.

First, we’d like you to bear in mind that we are planning a rather large wedding on a rather small budget, and in order to include all of those dear to us, we have had to limit our guest list. Unfortunately, it is very difficult to accommodate individuals (i.e. children and/or dates) that do not have a close personal relationship with us, given the serious budgetary and space constraints. If we were to include all possible children or dates,, our guest list would increase by a minimum of 40 and a max of 70 guests, depending on who would want to bring a date. Since our ceremony location can only accommodate a maximum of 200 guests, and our reception venue can only accommodate a max of 216 (and that’s with two tables on the dance floor), we’ve had to put a limit on who we invite. That said, the only children invited are our two nieces (who are in the wedding party) and three cousins. As for dates, we only gave “plus ones” to friends and family that are married or in serious long term relationships, meaning that some of our nearest and dearest, and all of our single friends and family did not receive a “plus one” for the wedding.

Additionally, we understand that there has been some confusion with regards to our request for formal attire at the wedding. It seems that there are varying opinions on what formal attire is! Some websites dictate that formal attire includes tuxedos and ball gowns; others describe formal attire as suits and dresses, or “wedding attire.” To clear this confusion up, we would like you to “dress up” for our wedding as it is a formal and fancy affair. That means no jeans and no casual wear. We’d like our male guests to please wear dress pants and dress shirts with ties and our female guests to wear dress pants or a skirt with a nice top, or a nice dress. We’ll be super dressed up so we’d like everyone else to be on par too- but no wedding gowns ladies! Haha

One last thing: we have sent registry cards for The Bay with our invitations, but we are also registered at Home Outfitters. You can find our registry online at: http://www.hbc.com/registry/find.aspx?gs=GIFTREGISTRY&site=bay&langid=EN

At any rate, we are more than grateful for any contribution our guests choose to make, whether from our registries, hand-made, hand-selected, or monetary.

What matters most to us is sharing our union with our families and friends!

Much love,
Craig & Athena

Changes to Ceremony and Honeymoon Plans

2011-03-16T23:05:00.003-06:00

I am a bit short of time at present; it's March madness/mayhem in the academic world, plus I'm working a lot lately to make some extra coin. That said, I just wanted to give you an update on a couple of changes to our ceremony and honeymoon plans.

First, we have decided not to have our ceremony at the Hotel MacDonald. Not only is it rather expensive, but we don't get much "bang for our buck" and the capacity is only for 125 people. Instead, we have chosen to wed at the McKay Avenue School in downtown Edmonton (104 Street and 99 Avenue) for it's historic charm, vaulted ceilings and skylights, beautiful hardwood floors and doors, and a capacity for 200 guests. The McKay Avenue School is now an historic building, a museum really for Edmonton Public Schools. It's a pretty cool venue with some versatility and is symbolic in a few ways. One, the building style and decor is reminiscent of our first apartment and the house we moved out of in November...old, antique-y grandeur. Two, we're both in still in school and we're getting married in a school. And three, I plan to be a professor so it just seems to suit us. It will require some more decoration than the Mac, but we're confident it will be just as beautiful!

Second, we have decided not to go to Europe for our honeymoon. It was a very difficult decision to make, since we both really want to go to Europe and we both REALLY wanted to see Gosia and Arnaud there, but, ultimately, it's just too expensive and too stressful to plan that epic of a honeymoon in the midst of school, on our pathetic budget, while also planning our wedding. As much as the old world calls us, we have set our sights on the new world....British Columbia. So far we have decided to drive to Kamploops a day or two after the wedding, stay overnight, then head straight to Victoria where we will stay at Abigail's Hotel for 5 nights in the Foxglove Room. We are really excited about this stay as it will be luxurious and romantic and while still a bit pricey, our 5 night stay will still be cheaper than one one-way flight to Europe. Also we will have a day at the spa, go on a horse drawn carriage ride, check out the Butchart Gardens, go on a whale watching excursion and enjoy gourmet breakfasts and our amazing room at Abigail's. After that, we are thinking of spending a couple of days in Tofino, though accommodation prices there are ASTRONOMICAL, so we're still working on that one. Once we leave the island we'll visit with friends (Steve & Pia, Jess & Colin, Cody) and check out Whistler or 100 Mile House then come home. Craig and I drive really well together...we actually really enjoy long drives and the conversations we have on them- excepting the Oprah argument (I loathe her...Craig thinks I am a bit over-the-top about it). In fact, on one spontaneous trip down to the states, our car stereo broke down so I spent our 24 hour drive home reading Craig The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger- a book from which we'll have a reading at our wedding ceremony.

At any rate, we are very happy with both of these decisions and are getting VERY excited for the big day! I will post again soon! xo

Honeymoon, Attire & Accessories, Ushers and the Ceremony

2011-02-15T22:16:00.004-07:00

Being that it’s been nearly two months since my last entry, this one has a lot of ground to cover and will be jumping around quite a bit, so bear with me!

First things first, we have chosen a location for our honeymoon and we are both incredibly excited about it: FRANCE! Thus far, we have decided that (finances pending), we will be going to Paris, that we will be leaving the day after our wedding, and that we will be gone for 20 days. For a portion of that time, we will be staying with the lovely Gosia and Arnaud in Paris, and we can’t bloody wait! To be able to spend a portion of our honeymoon with two people that are so special to us is such a gift, especially since we couldn’t go to France for their wedding, and they won’t be able to come here for ours. We are planning to see a travel agent over Reading Week to work out the details and choose the best value for our sadly dilapidated wallets. Quality is of the most import- we don’t want to be running all around Europe desperately trying to see everything in three weeks, so we need to decide on doing either a 10 days each in a couple of cities (i.e. Paris & Rome or Paris & Barcelona) or sticking with just France and dividing our time between Paris, Bordeaux and Morocco. But, we need to be as cost effective as possible and save all our pennies over the summer!

In other news, my wedding gown came in so I went to have a visit with it on December 18, 2010. Trying on my gown was surreal, and to be honest, I had been worried it would be too small. But luckily, it fit and I am beginning to shrink, so come spring we’ll be doing some serious alterations. Nonetheless, trying on a wedding gown that is actually mine and having Mom and Beav, Layne, Sarah and Danielle with me was very special. Also, although I had my heart set on wearing red shoes on the big day, we found the most gorgeous vintage-style ivory and crystal Cinderella shoes that took my breath away. They have been ordered (Thanks Mom!) and I will get to try them on with my dress on soon after I have my first hair trial done.

Speaking of hair trials, I have had many up-dos done professionally, and more often than not, I have been utterly devastated with the results. In the past, I would bring pictures of what I wanted and only one stylist was ever able to do what I wanted. I can’t count how many times Layne has fixed my hair for me after paying $80-$100 for a professional up-do. So, I am being very specific and particular about my wedding hair and I have a trial booked with a recommended stylist who is known for her retro-dos. I am going to have the stylist do an up-do one day, and a down-do a month later, after which I will promptly head over to Bridal Debut to check out my hair with the dress, shoes, earrings and veil, and make a decision. After that, my boot camp instructor, Ali, will be doing a make up trial for me to see how the make up I have in mind looks with my hair! I literally squealed with excitement once those appointments were booked and I can’t wait until February!

[NOTE: I started this blog entry over a month ago and have since had that first hair trial. It was pretty much disastrous! UGH. The stylist (who works alone) not only sent my Beav on errands for her (to get fake lashes for make up on me that she wasn’t hired to do (and looked a bit garish), and to get tin foil for her next appointment- what the hell?), also neglected to tell me on the phone that the style of hair I want requires two days to do. So, she said she would “sort of” be able to show me what it would be like, and it was a frizzy, not elegant or sleek, affair that cost me $65. Needless to say, I will be going with a different stylist- though I now feel a bit discouraged. Ali’s make up trial was beautiful and she is officially hired for the wedding! She did an amazing job of matching my skin tone and making my skin look flawless. I also loved the eye makeup and lipstick colour, though Craig asked me to choose more natural looking lashes. Lastly, trying on my dress and picking up my shoes was phenomenal. I have lost weight, making the dress a bit big in some spots but look a lot better in others! Plus, Craig is madly in love with my shoes! Hooray!]

In addition, I ordered Shae’s flower girl dress which came this month and is the sweetest, most beautiful little fancy black dress- I just love it! Can’t wait to see her in it with red shoes and her little ivory and black flower girl basket and ivory and red flowers in her hair. She is going to be such a little darling (not that she isn’t already!). Tara will be making Haley’s dress, which they have just picked out- a full length, strapless, black chiffon gown. She is going to be such a princess in that dress. Also, Tara is busy designing and making jewellery for me, Beav and the girls, which is so meaningful to me. I can’t wait to see all her hard work on the wedding day! Thank you so much, Tara!

Beav and I also went shopping for red Maid of Honour shoes, and we found the perfect shoe. They are so chic: deep rich red, patent peep-toes with a classy folded bow on top. Moreover, they have a lower heel so she won’t be towering over me too much! We’re both thrilled and can’t wait to get red shoes for the girls!

Over the Christmas holidays we asked Craig’s dear friend, Mikal LePage, and my pretty-much brother, Jordan Davis, to be our ushers: both accepted with genuine wholeheartedness. Mikal and Craig have been friends for about 15 years, and Mikal is one of the kindest and friendliest guys I have ever met. Not only is he considerate and thoughtful, but Mikal has always been very supportive of Craig and of our relationship. Also, his fondness for Craig is likely influenced by his wife, Kim, who grew up with Craig and Ted- they all lived on the same street. (You’ll actually see several growing up pictures of Kim, her sister Kirsten, Tracy and Craig in our wedding slideshow). Not long ago at a dinner party, Kim emphatically expressed her affection for Craig, her eyes welling up with tears, remembering their childhood and thinking about our futures. Her tenderness touched me deeply, and she echoed the sentiment on Mikal’s behalf, explaining to me how important his friendship with Craig is to him. While neither Craig nor Mikal are the most emotionally vocal gents, their friendship is one based on mutual respect, understanding, and the kind of unspoken support that is unfaltering. When I asked Craig for a Mikal story, this is what he said, “Mike’s the only guy I know who can make his tires squeal when taking a corner at 20 km/hr. That’s how skilled he is.”

Mikal

Craig & Mikal March 2011

Jordan and I have been close friends, siblings almost, for the last seven years. Our friendship really blossomed following the accident in 2004 that almost claimed my life. Since those days, Jordan has always watched over me like a brother would, loved me probably more than a brother would, and definitely put up with me more than a brother would! He supported me and carried me (literally and figuratively) more times than I can count, and his friendship has always been nonjudgmental, empathetic and undemanding. No matter what directions our lives have taken us, no matter how long we go between seeing each other, our friendship and love for each other has persevered. Jordan is quite probably the most generous person I know, and not afraid to voice his feelings. I think we tell each other “I love you” more than any of my other friends, and we always know how to validate each other, how to ground each other, and how to support each other. His is a friendship I could not live without, and the honour he does Craig and I by being a part of our day is a great one.

Jordan

Jordan & Me circa 2005

Lastly, we met with our wedding officiant, Bob Wyatt, in January and it was a delightful experience for us both. We definitely chose the right person to marry us, as Bob is enthusiastic, sincere, and genuinely interested in who we are independently and as a couple. After determining a bunch of small ceremony details, he assured us that the ceremony is “his show” and that he is the choreographer of that event: basically, we don’t need to worry about anything, we let him know how things are supposed to be and he will take care of anything. What an immense relief! Bob believes that we both already have so much to handle emotionally at the ceremony that dealing with the fine details is his job instead of ours. Moreover, he asked us thoughtful questions about how we met, when we knew we were in love, our proposal story (I realise I have yet to write about that), and what makes us confident that our love will persevere and our relationship will last a lifetime. They were both fun and difficult questions, but so important. Within a few days of the meeting, Bob had the first draft of our ceremony emailed to us and I replied with some edits. Craig and I will be writing our vows together and writing the ring exchange portion of the ceremony. Also, the English major/editor in me has passed off that duty to my ever ready, and brilliant proofer, Sarah (who you will remember from the post about cookie party favours). I am so thrilled that she has taken on this challenge, of editing and re-writing our wedding ceremony, as it means so much more that a dear friend has a part in creating the words that will bind us to each other. It makes it that much more special. Additionally, Beav and Ted will have speaking roles in our wedding ceremony, but I’ll keep the details a surprise!

We just cannot express enough appreciation for the many roles our friends and family are playing in our wedding. To us, our marriage is not just about us, but also about the community of people that support us, love us and make us who we are. Consequently, our wedding day is a day for all of us to celebrate mine and Craig’s love, and the union of our friends and families that results from it.

I love Craig...and other things wedding related.

2010-12-16T01:05:00.007-07:00

It’s been awhile…now that my crappiest semester in university is over (apathy, moving, migraines, surgery, etc. etc.), I finally have time to write for the wedding blog. I know some of you do, thank heavens, check regularly to see if I have written and for the immense delay, I apologize.

After such a long spell of not writing (on the blog that is), and recently catching some of you up on exciting wedding news, I feel a bit uncertain of what to devote this entry to (although after re-reading my blog entries thus far, I intended to write more about wedding helpers- which will come)…so bear with me if you find this entry episodic and all-over-the-place.

In between reading, writing and studying for school, I have mastered the art of procrastination. Not that I was an amateur, but etsy awoke in me an endless desire to browse and buy. There are so many beautifully made items, especially for weddings, that I quickly became an addict. Consequently, I have recently spent a nice chunk of money. However, each purchase has been completely and totally worth it- especially since I know that I am supporting entrepreneurs like my sister (Ivalaine) and Gosia (petit matin). Not only that, but each piece has been made with the care, precision and workmanship that you just don’t get from the big time bridal companies (or from mass-produced merchandise in general).

My first etsy purchase was an ivory and black garter set from Perfect Garter, which is both classy and sexy. I didn’t know that they come in sets, but one is for the garter toss and one is for me to keep. I really the like the idea of passing down wedding heirlooms, so not only do I plan to preserve my gown, but the garter and jewelry too.

And now, that I am writing this, I realize that I have not yet spoken about wedding colours or décor! Craig and I are planning on a budget so we have made every decision based on availability, accessibility and affordability. That said, The Matrix Hotel supplies linens and centre pieces (mirrors and votives) for the wedding, and due to limited colours we decided that the best choice was to do black and white (or ivory) with red accents (mostly being roses and rose petals). Thus, our flowers are red roses and our décor will be very classy black & white. Tables will have long white linens covered with smaller black ones and topped with white napkins. The round tables will have the mirrors and candles in the middle and have a wide circle of red and ivory silk rose petals around them. (I ordered all of the rose petals already for a great price from Petal Garden).

My next esty purchase was my wedding jewelry- which is just phenomenally beautiful. I had a very specific idea of what I wanted: elegant, vintage, and pearly. Also, without spilling about my dress, I decided I did not want a necklace, just earrings (long ones) and a hairpin. I was able to find EXACTLY what I wanted from Nyjole Jewellery for an incredible price (including shipping) and it came, handmade, unique, from Australia. When I opened it in the mail, I started to cry, it’s so beautiful.

I have also asked my brilliant, creative and gifted sister, Tara, who makes jewelry, to make me a snug pearl bracelet for my wedding day and some simple pearl jewelry for Beav for the wedding. Although she doesn’t have much experience with stringing, I hope she is up for the challenge. (Thanks in advance T! xo)

In addition to the garter and jewelry, I also found an adorable ivory and black sating ring bearer pillow and flowergirl basket custom designed by Romancing Juliet. So cute and I plan to give them to the girls as keepsakes from the wedding.

And last, but not least, I ordered my cake topper from etsy at Affordable Cake Topper. Rather than go with the traditional, bride and groom ceramic toppers (which are bloody expensive and really don’t suit us or our wedding), we ordered a black lettered topper: Mr & Mrs. I am very enraptured with this topper and my cake idea (as mentioned before, three different flavoured bundt cakes with white icing trickling down them and topped with red rose petals).

Outside of etsy, we also made our guest book. We had a very difficult time determining what we wanted for a guest book as we really wanted it to be a keepsake rather than a small book with guests’ signatures in it. After much deliberation and exploration, we decided to copy Jeff & Heather’s guestbook, and made one on iPhoto using the photos Jess did for us and a bunch of quotes we like. Best part is, it only cost us $35!

Now, on to wedding helpers!

Between Craig and I we have five sisters and we very much would like them all to play a part in the wedding, but we want it to be something special that is meaningful to them. As you already know, Beav is my MOH and Tara is making jewelry (and maybe the girls’ dresses). I really wanted to find a job for Holly that would allow her creativity (she is incredibly artistic) and be something she and I could do together (I love spending time with my sweet baby Holly). Since she and I share our passion for reading, we have asked Holly to select (with us) a reading for the wedding to complement Matt’s, and she has graciously accepted. With her sensitivity, thoughtfulness and heartbreaking earnestness, I am confident that Holly will be an unforgettable addition to our day. (Thank you, Holly xoxox).

Holly

Me & Holly circa 2007

Tracy, too, will play a speaking role in our wedding. And, let me tell you, if I have ever seen a big sister cherish her little brother, I see it in Tracy’s love for Craig. It’s palpable; I feel it every time I see her look at him. Not only does she absolutely adore Craig, but she makes every effort to get to know me and be close to me too. So it is with great pleasure that we have asked Tracy to give the opening toast at our wedding, the toast to the bride and groom. I can’t wait to hear it! (Thank you Tracy! xox)

Tracy

Craig & Tracy summer 2008

Lastly, not that I need to repeat it, I am so thankful to be marrying Craig. He is everything to me, and I feel overwhelmed and overcome with such happiness and joy whenever I think of our upcoming wedding. I love you, baby. Heaps. xo

The Wedding Party

2010-10-04T00:43:00.007-06:00

First of all, my apologies for the massive delay in posting a new entry to the blog. As most of you know, September is a crazy month for us university-goers, trying to get back into the swing of things. It’s been tough so far- let me tell you! Anyways, this is a wedding blog, not an Athena-complains-about-school-blog so I will get to it. In my last post, I mentioned that the next would be about the wedding party, so read on, my dears.

Long before Craig and I were engaged we had agreed to each only have one person stand up for us at our wedding, thinking that it would greatly simplify things. We both have a lot of friends (and I have four sisters), so choosing is a very difficult process.

I have known my whole life that my sister Erin (aka Beav) would be my Maid of Honour. It’s a no-brainer. We are a year and three days apart and have basically been inseparable since she was born. When we were kids we always looked out for each other and shared our friends, and as adults, with everything we’ve been through together, we still look out for each other and share our friends. As cliché as it is, words literally cannot express the love I feel for my sweet little Beavis. She is my protector, my confidante, my best friend, sometimes my mom (haha- my Mom and I call her “the mom”) and always, always my sister. She knows everything awful about me and still thinks I am the greatest (and vice versa)…we know each other so well and never really have to explain anything, we just inherently understand one other. Beav is the first person I go to for anything (and vice versa) and she always tells me how much she loves me and how much I mean to her. When I think about why I automatically chose Beav and why she is my very best friend (aside from Craig of course), I remember something she said after I broke my neck in 2004: she told me that if I had become a quadriplegic she would have spent the rest of her life taking care of me. She would never have let me go to a home or have someone else care for me, she would have done it herself. I realize this is generally how most families feel about each other, but Beav was so emphatic, so genuine, in her desire to take care of me, and is still that protective and loving. These are only a few of the many many many reasons that I love her so dearly, but I could write all day about how funny, sweet, caring, reliable and freaking awesome she is. No one else can anticipate my desires, needs and wants in planning my wedding the way she can, and she, above all people in my life wholly deserves the title Maid of Honour.

Me and Beav circa 1988

Me and Beav circa 2006

Craig’s number one, best friend and best man is Ted (aka Pickle). Craig and Ted grew up across the street from one another and have pretty much been best friends since they were born. Ted is one of the sweetest, kindest, most earnest and sincere people I have ever met, and he has been unwaveringly supportive of our relationship. Since the day I met him, I have had seriously warm fuzzies for the guy; Ted is, like Craig, a good man. I know that doesn’t sound like the most profound compliment, but it’s what attracted me and struck me most about Craig when we first started dating. Ted shares this quality with him, this innate goodness, consideration and compassion for people. Over the last three years, Ted has been there for many of the good times: we’ve partied together, eaten together, watched movies and played games together, we’ve had beers and wine together, we’ve moved together, and we’ve laughed together. And Ted has also been there for both of us through some of the hard times; readily assuring us that he is supportive of both of us and our relationship and doesn’t take sides. Consequently, we’ve made a ton of happy memories with both him and Dariel, and we love them both dearly. I realize as I write this that my description of Ted lacks the personal touch that Craig’s would, but I hope that I can at least convey how special Ted is, and how honoured we are that he has accepted the role of Best Man at our wedding. (Note: I asked Craig what he wanted to say about Ted, to which he replied, “Yeah, he’s cool.” So eloquent, I know).

Ted and Craig circa 2008

Ted

Now, I had thought these two made up our total wedding party (excepting the flower girl and ring bearer, which I will get to)…but once we were engaged and making decisions about the wedding, Craig very much wanted to include his other oldest friend, Paul, in the wedding party. Paul started hanging out with Craig and Ted in elementary and the three were soon inseparable. Their repertoire of friends has since grown substantially to include quite a large crew of Spruce Grove boys (Steve, Brett, Terry, Neil, Ryan, Dustin, etc. etc.), but these three have the longest history (I think). Anyways, Paul and Craig have been close for a long time and have shared lots of good times snowboarding, mountain biking, golfing, and any other sports Paul could rope Craig into doing with him (not to mention a lot of partying)! Paul is an unerringly loyal friend who would do anything for Craig; he has a great sense of humour, is athletic (if you didn’t guess that already), smart and fun to be around. Paul, like me, is extremely outgoing and social, and has always made an extra effort to include me in their circle, plus he puts in a lot of effort to maintain his friendship with Craig (as Craig is quite the hermit aka video gamer), which is such a strong indicator of his affection and loyalty. His easy-going personality and constant grin win him many friends, and when I asked Craig to describe him, he called Paul “scrumptious and dreamy.” Clearly, Paul is a necessary addition to our wedding party.

Paul

Sarah, Paul & Craig circa 2009

Evidently, Craig’s decision to add Paul to the wedding party prompted me to pick a second person for my side. Trying to choose between my other three sisters (Tara, Holly and Tamara) or my closest girlfriends (Alysha, Janine, Sarah, Ashley, Tina and Justine) was impossible, so I went a different route and chose one of my best guy friends instead. Knowing that Jeff wouldn’t want to be in the wedding party (it would just stress him out), I chose Rob, who I have been close friends with for about 16 years now. I gave the Toast to the Groom at Rob’s wedding in February (and May) of 2009, and he is one of the most important people in my life. Like Ted, Rob is one of the most sincere people I have ever known, and like Paul, he is eternally loyal. To me, Rob is family. Regardless of time or day, when I have needed Rob, he has been there: to change a flat tire, put me in my place, make me laugh or hold me while I’ve cried. The two years after I broke my neck were some of the most unstable and self-destructive months for me. I was highly emotional, angry and thoroughly miserable. But regardless of how hurtful or ugly I behaved, Rob stood by me. He responded not with judgment or frustration but with patience, love and complete empathy. Clearly, Rob is an irreplaceable friend; he is the brother I have always wanted. And so, like Beav, he belongs in my wedding party. However, since having accepted the role of bridesMAN at our wedding, he has received a ton of teasing…many people ask if he is gay, if he’ll wear a dress, or if he’ll dance with Paul, etc., etc., which is really ridiculous (such a double standard since if I was in his wedding party I wouldn’t be teased at all). At any rate, I am grateful and honoured that Rob will be standing up with us on our wedding day.

Rob and Me circa 2005

Rob on his wedding day February 19, 2009

Last, but not least, are our flower girl and ring bearer: our nieces Haley and Shae. We had originally intended for Haley to be the flower girl and Shae to be the ring bearer, but we may change their roles since Haley is more likely to be entrusted responsibly with the rings (she is 7 years older than her sister Shae). Our little Shaeby is quite the self-possessed and mischievous little girl so we’re thinking flowers may be the better route for her. Both of our nieces are incredibly beautiful little things who we love dearly, so their role in our day is very special to us. Although Shae won’t remember it, Haley will and I hope it will be a memory she’ll cherish.

Haley & Shae Summer 2010

Thank you Beav, Ted, Paul, Rob, Haley and Shae (so Tara and Bill too) for being such an integral part of our wedding day. We are looking forward to all the awesome wedding festivities and memories to be made in the next 10 months or so! Xoxoxo

Next entry: more friends doing more jobs!

Early (for out of town guests) Email Save the Dates

2010-08-31T17:26:00.002-06:00

Create your own free invitation card

Planning: Stage 2 (Slideshow, Cake, Ceremony Music, Ceremony Readings, Masters of Ceremonies)

2010-08-29T12:25:00.004-06:00

I’m going a bit on a tangent (from continuing my last post) here because I am a very excitable person and I desperately want to share with you some of the things that friend of ours are doing for the wedding. But, I suppose, it’s not really a tangent since the last blog was about planning and these are plans!

That said, Alysha knew as soon as she met Craig that he and I were meant to be, and this was back before we were officially a couple. She saw us together and, to her, it was blatantly obvious that we would spend the rest of our lives together. She was also our impromptu roommate for a year (and now we miss her dearly), so she has a very special insight into our relationship. Evidently, Alysha is one of my best friends in the world, loves me and adores Craig (lucky for us), so she and I have obviously talked a lot about our potential wedding long before we actually got engaged.

Last year I took on creating the slideshow for my friends’ Rob & Stacey’s wedding, and without Alysha’s assistance and Photoshop skills, that would have been a serious challenge. With her help I was able to make a beautiful slideshow despite the difficulties with pictures, and we decided then that she would create our slideshow. When we did get engaged, Alysha reiterated her desire to do this, and in the last year and some, she has greatly enhanced her slideshow building skills to movie building skills and I am pumped for what she creates for us! And if that is not enough, this beautiful, talented and wonderfully creative woman has also offered to make our wedding cake! (Which will be very non-traditional. I have told her I want Bundt cakes with rose petals on them- surprised? No, you probably aren’t. Haha.) We are so blessed to have Alysha as a friend and she will be a integral part of our wedding day.

Alysha & Me New Year's Eve 2009

Now, my friend Sean, who loves to tell people that I forced him to be my friend, is a phenomenal and passionate musician, so it seemed fairly obvious to me that he should be playing guitar at our wedding. Aaron, too, has been in my life for about 10 years and plays beautifully, so we have asked these two gents to collaborate and write music for the wedding ceremony. They have graciously accepted the challenge and are going to put some acoustic melodies together for when people are arriving and being seated, and again when the wedding is over and everyone is leaving. Furthermore, they will also write a song for me to walk down the aisle to. I couldn’t be happier have to have these two so intimately involved in our wedding ceremony, as they are such good friends of ours, and did I say remarkably talented?? I think I did, but I am saying it again: they are remarkably talented.

Aaron Summer 2008

Sean Nordegg 2009

Matt is another dear dear friend, a fellow (and again, remarkably talented) writer, a romantic, and a terrifically funny guy. We have been friends for 10 years, and you could probably say I have forced my friendship on Matt as well as Sean (funny how well these two get along!). But Matt owns this place in my heart that has these huge pangs of love, and a never-ending supply of sympathy for him. Anyway, he also has a wonderful voice and has accepted the offer to do a reading at the wedding ceremony. I have yet to choose that reading, but there is a good chance it will be from a novel, and an even better chance that it will be from The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger, as I read that book to Craig during a radio-less 20 hour drive home from California, so it has some nostaligic meaning to us- and is a painfully beautiful love story. So- Matt plus raw emotion equals a reading at our wedding. Yay Matt! We love you!

I don’t have a lot of time right now, but I’ve wanted to get these bits of wedding information on the blog for a while so this, too, is a to be continued post. There are a lot of friends and family involved in the wedding, and there will be more jobs to hand out as planning continues….. BUT, one last mention:

Last night I asked our dear friends (and dammit they HAVE be considered family) Tina and Ryan, to be our MCs at the wedding. Thankfully, they accepted, rather enthusiastically, which was such a joy to me! A little history: I have known Tina since she was about 12 years old, and her brother is my brother-in-law. We share a niece and a crap-load of memories, so it just seems like we SHOULD be family…but I guess, technically, we’re not. Who cares! Hahaha Family I say we are!

Anyhow, Ryan MC’d my sister and Tina’s brother’s wedding, and he was wonderfully funny. This married couple has lots of experience standing up in front of an audience (Ryan is a musician and Tina is a drama teacher); they are smart, funny, creative and so much fun! So we are really really thrilled to have such an awesome couple MC, and be so intimately involved in, our wedding.

So it is wrought with anticipation, pleasure and delight that I share these wedding tidbits. And of course, immense gratitude for the ceaseless generosity and kindness of our friends, whose involvement in our wedding is what will make it such a unique, intimate and memorable experience. With our wedding, I very much look forward to the development of a combined community of our family and friends.

Thank you Alysha, Sean, Aaron, Matt, Tina and Ryan! We LOVE you! Xoxoxox

Next entry: The Wedding Party

Planning: Stage 1 (Venues, Photographer, Invitations, Wedding Bands)

2010-08-20T23:49:00.005-06:00

Today is one year until our wedding! Hooray!

Now that that’s out there, as I mentioned in my last post, even though Craig and I have only been engaged for just over two months, much of our wedding is already planned. However, I didn’t really say too much about what those plans are….so this post is about what decisions we’ve made thus far.

First, even before we were engaged we decided that we wanted to have a cocktail style reception because we wanted to be able to invite all of our family and friends without having to cut the guest list down to afford catering (about 200 people).

For those of you in the dark about this term, it means we are forgoing catering a meal for all of our guests. Instead, we are having a private dinner at a restaurant with just our immediate families (parents, siblings, grandparents) and our wedding party. Consequently, the reception will begin later than usual (cocktails at 7pm), we will arrive later than usual (presentation at 8pm) and once we get there we will jump right into speeches (my favourite part of weddings). Then we’ll have the slideshow and cake cutting followed by the dance. At around 11pm a late night lunch will be served (croissants, sandwiches, coffee and tea).

We’ve received a lot of support and understanding on this decision since we’re both students and have amazingly supportive families and friends. And although I always dreamed of a traditional wedding, the private dinner has become, in our minds, an oasis in the midst of a busy action (and emotion) packed day.

www.jessicafernfacette.com

Most of our married friends have talked about how busy, demanding and exhausting getting married actually is, especially at large weddings (200+ guests) where the Bride and Groom are playing host and hostess to a ton of people; never mind running from the ceremony to the pictures to the reception. That said, I see the dinner as this 3-hour interlude where we can relax, eat, absorb, and bask in the love, comfort and laughter of our nearest and dearest. Intimacy and relationships are, after all, what weddings are about… so it’s utterly imperative to me that our parents, siblings, grandparents and wedding party get some serious quality time with us on our wedding day. (Thanks, Mom, for suggesting over a year ago that we do a private dinner when we get married!)

Again, we had all these decisions made prior to our engagement, so we just had to find the venues for all three events (ceremony, dinner, reception). Knowing how much work wedding planning is and wanting to get a head start, my Maid of Honour (my sister Erin, a.k.a. Beav) and I decided to check out some potential venues. I fell in love with the first place we saw: The Union Bank Inn. Historic, classy, beautiful and intimate: we could have had the ceremony, dinner and reception there for a reasonable price, but it was too small for the guest list we had loosely worked out, and would have to have been a standing reception. Sadly, I looked elsewhere. Since my Mom has worked for Westcorp Inc. for nearly 20 years, and they own The Matrix Hotel downtown, we thought we’d meet with them to check out the Quartz Ballroom. However, I had already checked their room rental and catering fees and deemed it way out of our price range. But, as luck would have it, we were able to get a staff discount on the room booking for the reception, and since we only wanted to cater a late lunch, it became within budget. Craig and I decided to check out some other options, but in the end, we chose The Matrix since it’s beautiful, big, and has lots of benefits: one being full seating for the cocktail reception for about 200 guests!

The next item we booked was our photographer, Jessica Fern Facette, which was also a pre-engagement choice. Jess is a very sweet, intriguing, talented and generous friend of mine who did a photo shoot for us in 2008. The moment I laid eyes on a photograph of hers I knew she was the “one” (photographer-wise, of course). Her artistic style is such that you feel nostalgic, sentimental and romantic instantaneously; her photographs give you this raw and beautiful look into people’s relationships…they are transcendent and deeply intimate. Moreover, doing a shoot with Jess is remarkably organic. She has this way of making herself invisible, allowing you to interact naturally with each other; she is a master of capturing that personal-ness, giving her photographs an authentic quality. Clearly, there was no question in our minds who our photographer would be!

Next, we focused on our ceremony venue. Neither Craig nor I are religious, eliminating churches from our list of venues. And let me tell you, finding an affordable and/or beautiful non-church, indoor venue for a wedding is a major pain the arse (and that, friends, is a euphemism). We considered an outdoor venue, but they were all obscenely expensive or required us to rent chairs and rely on friends and family to do the set up. Being students, we have enough stress in our lives, we wanted to be able to have a wedding in our budget that requires the least amount of effort (hence selecting a hotel for our reception). As a result, renting chairs/tents, decorating, and organizing helpers, along with planning for potentially inclement weather, ruled out an outdoor venue.

We then considered the Citadel, Rutherford House, the Muttart Conservatory, and Fort Edmonton, but they were all too small. We considered the Art Gallery of Alberta, the Winspear Centre and the Mayfield pagoda, but none of those felt quite right. The Union Bank Inn ended up being booked for a ceremony and reception on our chosen date, and while Convocation Hall at the University of Alberta nearly became our choice, we decided against it because the contact person was terrible: rigid, uncompromising and difficult. Since we almost spent a heap of money on Convocation Hall we figured we might as well check out the Hotel MacDonald. We fell head over heels for the Wedgewood Room! Breathtakingly beautiful, requires little to no decorations, and felt exactly right. But, although we juggled our budget to have the ceremony of our dreams, we cannot book the Hotel MacDonald’s Wedgewood Room until four months before the date of our wedding (scary!!). Therefore, we booked another venue in the event that we aren’t able to secure the Wedgewood Room (I’ll reveal that little detail if Hotel Mac falls through).

www.jessicafernfacette.com

Amidst all this hunting and viewing and planning, I bought a bridal magazine in which Craig found a wedding band that he loved, a Scott Kay band from the Troy Collection. An incredibly unique band, we had to search for retailers and the only one in Edmonton is Swedish Jewellers (this is the Tiffany’s of Edmonton, for those that don’t know). Thinking this ring would cost a bloody fortune, we went to check it out anyway, and bought it that very day for an unbelievably good price! Craig was so excited he wore the ring while we were out and about that day and was sad to put it away for over a year until the wedding. He said it wasn’t fair that I get to wear my ring now (gotta love him- my engagement ring is part of a bridal set)!

The last thing I am going to write about tonight is our invitations, which are already complete and ready to be printed. Shortly after our 2008 shoot with Jess, my lovely friend Gosia and I were looking at the photographs and we thought it would be both original and creative to use one of them for our future wedding invitations. Since Craig and I both wanted a postcard invitation, we combined that idea with the photograph idea, and our invitation was conceived. Now, over two years later, Gosia’s glorious husband, Arnaud, took that conception and gave birth to it! (Like my lame metaphor?) So, our invitations were masterfully, artfully, and lovingly created from France. The process was a bit grueling for Arnaud, I think, as we had about four propositions for the front and three for the back, but Gosia and Arnaud took all of our comments, ideas, and desires with grace and expertise. As many of you know, I am rather particular, so their patience and understanding has been quite remarkable, and enormously appreciated. Aranud is wonderfully talented, and created a beautiful invitation that fits us and our wedding perfectly. As Craig said, the invitation is both dramatic and elegant at the same time.

Ultimately, things have come together smoothly and rather easily for us so far, thanks to timely opportunities and the phenomenal generosity of family and friends. Without them, our wedding wouldn’t be coming together in what feels like the perfect way. Neither of us could ever have imagined that we’d be planning this elegant, classy and intimate wedding and we both know that we wouldn’t be if it weren’t for fate, friends and family. Thus, this blog entry is a massive thank you to our parents, Jess, Gosia & Arnaud, as well as the kindness of opportunity.

…to be continued (I have much more to share yet, and more people to thanks as I share it!)

Choosing

2010-08-09T16:16:00.001-06:00

For those of you who have already read this post in my facebook notes, please bear with me. I figured it's best to start the blog with my first post on getting married. So here it is:

So, Craig and I are getting married!! Everyone we know, knows this by now, and some (namely, my family) have heard me say it over and over and over for the last 8 weeks. Well, my lovely friend Ashley, who is delightfully creative and crafty, sent me the link to the best blog EVER. And I am not a blog reader (or writer, for that matter). This blog is called "A Practical Wedding & Reclaiming Wife" and is written by a very intelligent, funny woman, called Meg (www.apracticalwedding.com). I seriously recommend that all engaged and married people check this blog out.   

Since about the end of June I have checked this blog daily and often lose myself for an hour or more reading old posts. Meg's blog not only makes you feel grounded and justified for the wedding decisions you've made that may be "faux pas" or unconventional (like skipping party favours and having a private intimate dinner [wedding party and immediate families only] instead of catering a meal for about 200 people), but her posts rather eloquently (and blatantly) remind you of WHY you're getting married and WHAT marriage means.   

So, even though our entire wedding is almost completely planned well over a year in advance, when I find myself agonizing over etiquette (whether we should or should not provide some liquor for guests, whether we should register somewhere when we really don't want to, whether we've ensured all our nearest and dearest have a role [do they even want one??]), Meg's blog is my "go-to" for emotional grounding. What really matters here, throughout our planning and on our day, is me and Craig and the commitment we are making to each other. As much as I am a people pleaser, and realize that our special day is special to more than just us, I have to remind myself that I can't please everybody and what the purpose of the wedding actually is.  

On Saturday, my Mom, Grama and I went to Bridal Debut in Sherwood Park to order my wedding dress. And that one act- not the engagement, booking our reception, choosing and paying a deposit on our photographer- but ordering the dress, brought home the reality that Craig and I are getting married. I was suddenly overwhelmed. Wow. This is really happening, we are really getting married, we have truly chosen each other to grow old with, no matter what happens.

And so, this leads me to the purpose of this post: something I read on APW yesterday, a post by another engaged woman, Sharon

(http://apracticalwedding.com/2010/08/wedding-undergraduate-on-choosing/):

"I think dating/deciding to marry is something like deciding to buy a house and make it your home. You figure out what’s available in your area, what works for your lifestyle, and what “must-haves” you want, and then you go looking. (note: This is, of course, a somewhat imperfect analogy as some of us aren’t “looking” when the right person comes around. I certainly wasn’t. But bear with me…) But the thing is… there’s not a Platonic conceit of “your house” that you just have to locate in reality. The truth of the matter is that you will see many houses, and most of them will have some aspect of what you want. One will have the gorgeous bay windows and gleaming hardwood floors. Another will have the giant kitchen with the granite countertops. A third will have a turret and built-in shelves. These are all great houses. You can see yourself living in all of them. But the day comes when you decide that one house is the one you’re going to buy. You move in. You clean. You do a bit of painting. You learn to live with the slight incline in the floors and to jump the creaky step in the staircase. You have dinner parties that last until 2am in this house. You host holidays in this house. You bring your babies back to this house. You could’ve had any of the houses you looked at, all those years ago. But you chose this one and it’s now the only home you can imagine having.  

So yup, that’s my long, cheesy metaphor for why Jason’s “The One.” I could say I’m marrying him because he makes me laugh or really listens when I’m upset or is not afraid of my moods. I could say I’m marrying him because he’ll make a great father one day, because he is a great friend. All these things are true, but it is also true that there are other people in the world who can do these things for and with me. The fact of the matter is, I’m marrying him because we’ve growntoward one another in the entire time we’ve been dating. Because I’ve worked on the specific faults of mine that bother him most, or are most detrimental to our particular relationship and he’s done the same. Because we’ve chosen to learn each other’s needs and quirks and wants. Because we’ve chosen to make this relationship our home, and that rules out the other houses."  

That about sums it up for me. We chose each other.

Welcome!

2010-08-09T15:31:00.009-06:00

This is my first attempt at blogging and also mine and Craig's wedding website. I decided since I am reading APW (www.apracticalwedding.com) daily and having so many of my own thoughts and emotions as Craig and I plan our wedding that a blog/wedding website would be a good idea.

This way, friends and family can see what we've planned, share in the planning, and maybe even give a little encouragement, advice or feedback. Please feel free to comment and to ask questions!

love
athena xo